What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
did I really admit that id have sex with that cougar had I been more drunk?...ugh...i need to masterbate more
Would you feel weird if I asked out ___?
You dont call on our son's bday but you want to know if I'll give you permission to date my best friend?
So...no?`
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
I don't know man, I woke up and shes here acting like she knows me, wearing my clothes, and scrambling eggs in my kitchen. I don't know her.
You were drinking with me last night, I warned you.
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
Randomize
