He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
Yeah, reverse cow girl. She was on top and I was playing Flappy Bird behind her back. Easiest way to have angry sex.
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Randomize
