Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
I'm going to get so drunk tonight, I actually feel bad about the 30 seconds of drunken awkward sex I'm going to have with one lucky fat chick.
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
Randomize
