So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
I can't break up with him, I ran the math. Taking into account his 7 inch penis and the standard deviation from average, almost 90% of guys should have a smaller penis than he does.
Really? Penis math? This is why guys shouldn't date female engineers.
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
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