It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
my brother is so whacked out on percocet from hurting his legs that he started crying because his belly button was so cute
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
I'm going to have to start playing roller derby again so I can blame my sex-related bruises on that.
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
I told her we had to stay at the bar until at least midnight because that's when my direct deposit hit, don't tell me i'm not responsible
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
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