thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
I'm at breakfast still drunk holding a blow up parrot
Billy Mays is dead, Vince Schlomi is in jail, who's going to sell me useful gadgets at ridiculously low prices now?!
I want you more than these girls want KFC
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Randomize
