she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
is 1am too late, or too early to make bacon?
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
I woke up this morning with my hair wrecked, a split lip, and an "H" on my right knee and a "I!" on my other knee.
Just drunk tweeted NASA asking them to give me a lift home in one of their spaceships. Fingers crossed
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
Randomize
