I only kidnapped one of them. chill
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
I'm wearing the jeans from casino night. Tell me why I have a napkin in my pocket that says 'dont fear me'? I'm hoping it was just a coincidence.
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
You passed out in your dogs bed and you only willingly woke up because I told there was a bottle of vodka and a snickers bar waiting for you upstairs
Ok I'm drunk as fuck already at 529 and this waitress started flirting with me, I wanna bang her for acknowledging my existence
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
So I ended the trip with two cold sores, poison ivy on my leg and vagina, and no alcohol or weed. WORST. 4TH. OF. JULY. EVER.
Randomize
