weddingsv make me drug and hornr
I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
Its not that I don't mind giving her as much as my penis as she wants, its the post sex cigarette I have to supply. Shits $9 a pack.
Put a tip jar next to your bed from now on.
Your good ideas are reason #4 we need to live together.
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
I hope to God it's not the new neighbors having sex, because what I'm hearing sounds like a mildly defective vuvuzela or a cow giving birth.
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
Randomize
