you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
Just so you know, I'm standing in my bra eating cereal. My keys were in the cereal box.
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
Who had my phone last night? Whoever it was sent "Fuck you, you're adopted" to half the people on my contact list.
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
Randomize
