The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
Can't talk, ducks in the car
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
Randomize
