Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
Well call me tomorrow, it's a great story that may lead to me being fired and/or possibly being buried in a shallow grave somewhere out in wine country.
You told me to remind you that the bruise on your ass is from when you danced on the table at Ziggy's, saw a cop and tried to 'fly away'.
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
