THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
my fart just smelled so bad i acutally gagged
just because you are now my girlfriend does not mean you can text me nasty shit
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
Bloody Mary Monday just took a turn for the worst... Just had a heart to heart talk with the cat about it's obsession with chewing on cardboard.... Time for a nap.
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
I have a hunchback of notre dame journal from when I was 6 wherein sits a diary entry that reads "saw liar liar today. Carrey's best yet" and that's all.
She came home, put on the news, left a 20 minute drunk message on her friends machine, then proceeded to play back the entire message laughing hysterically and then just passed out
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
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