who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
I cant believe that bitch gave me herpes. she said those bumps were just a part of the natural landscape
wait, did she really refer to her vagina as a landscape?
why are you more concerned about her word choice than the fact that I HAVE FUCKING HERPES
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
you threw up because you drank 13 SHOTS
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
Oh Jesus. Are you going to the hospital?
No I'm showering then leaving for Vegas
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.
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