He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
I dropped my keys into the toaster and felt it push down as I pulled them out. Couldn't stop thinking it was a bad idea the whole time.
I still don't know how you've lived this long.
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
My dad called me in the middle of the night, drunk on vodka, asking for references on the Irish alphabet.
you know you need to get laid when: getting wrestled to the ground in a self-defense class turns you on....p.s. this is a booty call
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
Randomize
