i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
You smell like a Billy Joel song
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
My dad, when he got home and saw me loading a bowl in the living room: "We have TWO beautiful balconies to get high on and you pick the couch?!"
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
Randomize
