omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
I got kicked out of an open bar wedding reception. The bride "felt threatened" by my presence. Not my fault she's ugly
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
Just made a drug contact standing in the sandwich line in the dining hall. Is this real life?
You're my fucking hero.
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
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