I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
This girl just stopped in the middle of a sentence because of my blue eyes. She said she got lost in them. I am laying pipe tonight.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
Was having relations of the behind variety with my girlfriend. Based on where we were at I could see myself in the bathroom mirror. You know I did the Patrick Bateman point and wink at the mirror and turned on sissudio by Phil Collins.
Forever getting my life back together in gas station bathrooms.
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
Randomize
