I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
Having my alarm go off at 3:30 makes me wanna rip my dick off and shove it through my eye socket
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
TSA literally pulled two bottles of whiskey out of my bag. Once he saw the leopard print socks and the mickey mouse tank, he put it back in my bag and said "Have a fun trip, man."
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
The drag queen you used to date and the girl you brought over last night are discussing your sex noises in my living room. I'm changing my locks.
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
