A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
Great night. I'm in the middle of explaining to her how the stock market works and she just rips my pants off and starts blowing me. Nerdiest blowjob ever.
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
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