You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
From the crime scene it appears that I attempted to throw up into a candle.
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
U know u have sex too much when u have lube in ur rolliball on ur blackberry
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
just found a shoebox labled "emergency smoking box"... it has a lightbulb, 2 potatoes, a dried up flower, and a button that says "stop drop and roll". what did we do last night?!
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
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