is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
probably shouldnt have written that paper while wasted, its starts with once upon a time
i tried to stop you but you kept shouting "two birds with one stone!"
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
It's not a walk of shame if you run
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