Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
I need to wake up with a beard between my thighs more often, I'm a fucking saint.
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
This couple is walking their pig around campus
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
Sorry I totally pulled a home invasion on you last night
That was super inconsiderate of me
Remember the Giant sandworm from the movie Dune? Well that's about how big his dick is. No bulshit.
Randomize
