You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
The only people who have said happy valentines day to me today have been 2 homeless people.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
Randomize