Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
so i woke up with ketchup and a sticky boob on my face...this is a new low
Apparently oprah and I were in competition to see who's ass could get bigger this summer
when i'm drunk i think im just gonna point at him and yell adultery is a sinnnn. youre going to helllll
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.
If I am telling you about the details of the shits I take I probably don't want to have sex with you. Probably.
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
Btw I definitely had pizza sauce on my face, a painful hickey on my neck, and I just remember screaming SISTER WIVES because of the girl's 1997 jean skirt! Wow.
Randomize
