what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
She called me her ex's name in a supermarket. How boring am I that she livens up shopping by thinking of another guy?
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
I was puzzled last night that there were shots waiting for us when we got there. Just read my messages and saw you were ordering from the bar via texts.
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
Can we just cry and dive into a couch-sized bag of sadness-chips, dip them in a la-z-boy sized jar of depression salsa while watching a show called 'Forget Your Hopes and Dreams, Just Kill Yourself'?
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
You went outside, peed in the front yard, and asked me to bring you some toilet paper.
Randomize
