He was rambling about life and dignity and happiness. but all i kept thinking was PENIS. YOU HAVE A PENIS. I CAN SHOW YOU WHERE TO PUT THAT PENIS.
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
We ran out of ice cubes so I used ice cream. Everyone thought that was the plan all along. I just went with it.
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
You told your mom that it was your second day sober. I think she believed it until you jumped off the balcony
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
I don't know what part of my sober brain thought it was a good idea to get stoned when I can barely walk with crutches as it is, but that part is stupid.
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
Randomize
