let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
i'm pretty sure they aren't charging me for that window i broke with a turkey sandwich while i was hammered.
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
Apparently this is my life now. Fucking men in their 30s with small dogs.
There was this blissful moment of peace and quiet... then you ran past our window with a lit firecracker in hand going, "SHIT. SHIT. SHIT!"
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
I need a beard to bite.
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize
