U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers
There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
Randomize
