they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
He may or may not be blacked out. We put him to sleep in the community bathroom. He's wrapped in your blanket and he's already puked on it twice. Using your blanket was my idea. Maybe next time you'll ask before taking my vodka.
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
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