I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
She actually said during sex "the only thing that would make this more perfect is if we were listening to Lenny Kravitz"
So, obviously, you had to give a fake number this morning.
Yes. Also, we may never be able to go back to that bar again.
You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
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