worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
Remind me to tell you the story of the fuzzy condom
I just want this to serve as a reminder in the morning that the topic of conversation at last call was the penis size of jesus.
Randomize
