We're facebook friends in real life
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
Randomize
