absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
I'm having sex on a snuggie, yes i stopped to text you
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
It was one of those you-have-no-other-way-home-and-we-already-made-out-so-I-guess-youre-coming-home-with-me-if-you-promise-to-leave-early kind of deals.
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
Client visitor days are the worst. If I have to wear a tie and can be hungover at least have the decency to find some more attractive visitors
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
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