our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
I fucking hate you. Some slutty looking drunk chick backed her ass up across the bar and started grinding on you. You ignored her because you didn't want to share you drink
I care about my drink far more than her feelings
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
She bent over while grinding on me on the dance floor and her thong straps were hanging out, I thought it was a good idea to grab the straps with both hands and pretend to be riding in Santa's sleigh...not my brightest moment.
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
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