This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
I'm at an open mic night and the next act is called 'the best creed cover band ever.' The guy i recently hooked up with is on bass.
We got drunk before dinner. People at the other tables were praying for us.
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
Oh god now he thinks I'm into him because I've been staring at him trying to figure out what animal he looked like
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
Randomize