Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
i came home at 4 a.m. and made a dozen eggs and three lbs. of bacon. my mom woke up and the only thing she was pissed about was that i used the whole carton of eggs, but then she sat down and ate with me
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
Randomize
