I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
My girl came home. i was jacking off on the couch and she just starts telling me about her day, as if im not half naked with my hand on my cock.
Why did you fed-x me a peanut butter sandwich?
It seemed like the thing to do. There's popcorn on it too.
STOP smoking sooo much weed. Damn
What's more sad than going to Target to buy Plan B and the new Sam Smith album?
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
wow bdsm is so cute
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