Tonight was fucked up. First my mom called me and told me I had to go to the bar to pick up my dad 'cause he was drunk. Then when I got there my dad was doing a body shot from this lady who happened to be my 1st grade teacher. By far the most awkward car ride home. Idk if I should tell my mom or not.
After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
there was a trapeze. enough said
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
I guess I fist pumped too hard. I hit my mom in the face and now we're sitting in the ER.
When we told the nurse what happened, she replied with "OH, Well you don't look Italian to me!"
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
so the x-ray technician didnt buy my story of falling off a curb. she said a fall of that height couldnt snap the bone that way. bitch called me a drunken idiot too. if she wasnt so hot i'd be angry
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
Randomize
