Heybabeimwearingurpanties
he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
how the hell did we fit 12 drunk lesbians in your car?! I felt like we were playing lesbian tetris last night.
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
He makes furniture for a living and is basically a hot, younger Ron Swanson
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
Randomize
