Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
IF THE GUY WHO I AM BORROWING OUR CAR FROM FINDS ONE CONDOM OR JIZZ STAIN IN THIS CAR HE IS GOING TO CASTRATE MY ASS. SERIOUSLY, DON'T FUCK IN THE CAR.
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
I just slammed a bottle of white wine before I came to Whole Foods so basically I'm just training to be a middle aged white woman.
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
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