like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
He's not actually Jewish. Turns out he just wears the yarmulke to cover his bald spot.
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
I DMed the cop that arrested me to come unlock my keys out if my car today
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
He KNOWS ALL THE WORDS TO "JESUS IS MY FRIEND", I swear if he even tries to pull shit with me I'm becoming an actual nun.
His cat just sat there and simultaneously bobbed his head up and down while I blew him
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
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