On my way home i need to take a massive dump and couldn't wait.
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
You know how you thought that you put on a condom last weel?
yea
turns out that you did...and i just found it.
halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them.
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
the night ended with taco bell and tears
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
Randomize
