I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
captain&coke to the library. STAT. this is an emergency. this is not a drill. I repeat: THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
I just picked up my phone and one shoe from the man mowing the lawn next to the ice rink. He found them in a tree.
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
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