Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
She announced her abortion via fbk
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
I did the walk of shame to church this morning.
hooker boots and all?
Yep. People looked at me like I was the prodigal daughter returning home. Full of sins but welcome anyway.
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
You talked about giving to sperm banks on a first date. What did you expect?
Yeah man... I ordered donuts, drank wine, and cried to a movie with Seth Rogen in it. Do you really think I have my shit together?
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
Randomize
