Oww! U thought rug burn was bad! Fuckin carseat burn hurts like a mother!!!
Wtf?
Use the slutty part of ur brain.
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
anyone who says 'i love you' and then followed by 'im going to call the cops if you touch me' doesnt really mean the first part fyi
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
Apparently I give handjobs in my sleep. So that's interesting.
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
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