he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
Do you know my vagina holds 14 pints of water?
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
I'm always down for nudity.
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