It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
Um ... did I have a lizard on my shoulder last night at the bar?
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
my favorite part of this morning was sitting at the gynecologist smelling like cigarettes and wearing yesterday's clothes.
Think i may just have managed the saddest high-five in history. Finished a sudoku and high-fived myself, then looked around for somebody to high five. there was noone. forever alone.
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
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