That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
Pretty sure my dad just walked in on me jerking off watching guys on webcam. Remember how I used to say "most awkward day of my life?" I'm retiring that phrase.
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
We should invent fake asshair for you to wear so you can experience my pain for a day.
Just drug him and when he wakes up be like "you just woke up from a coma, we've been married for the past five years." It'll be like the Vow but fucked up.
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
I believe in your delicious
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
Randomize
