Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
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